The Emotional Load of Parenting: Why We Need to Talk About It
Parenting is relentless. The emotional load we carry takes a battering daily, yet we rarely acknowledge it—let alone talk about it. We suffer in silence, sometimes not even sharing the weight with our partners because life is just too busy.
I have been there. When my kids were small, there were days I struggled just to leave the house. Even now, I know my emotional balance is off when I catch myself snapping at them. Between work, kids, and the never-ending to-do list, there’s little space left to reflect on how we’re really feeling.
When Will You Make Time to Reflect?
It doesn’t have to be a big commitment—just two minutes with your morning coffee.
Try my Traffic Light Check-In to assess where you're at emotionally:
Red Light (Stop/Seek Help)
Feeling disconnected, overwhelmed, or unable to cope? Take everything you can off the to-do list and evaluate your options for support. This is a sign you need immediate rest or help—whether from your partner, family, friends, or a support group.
Yellow Light (Caution/Slow Down)
Feeling stressed, exhausted, or stretched too thin? You’re managing, but it’s time to slow down and prioritize self-care. Take a couple of things off your to-do list and replace them with something that brings you joy and supports your physical and mental health—like booking that yoga class or catching up with a friend over coffee.
Green Light (Thriving/Go)
Feeling energized, productive, and calm? You’re in a good space and ready to take on challenges.
The Hidden Weight of Parenting
Parenting also stirs up memories of how we were raised, making us question how things have changed and whether we’re doing it "right." Then, there’s the added pressure from social media, where picture-perfect moments leave us doubting ourselves.
One thing that may help is identifying your parenting values. Sit down with your partner (or on your own, if you’re solo parenting) and ask:
👉 What are the four most important values we want to guide our parenting?
Having this clarity helps in making key decisions and showing up in a way that aligns with what truly matters to you.
I recently did this while creating my vision board, and one of my core values for parenting is actually connecting with my kids—no distractions, just one-on-one time, listening to them. I’ll admit, with three kids, this is hard to do on a daily basis. But I know when I make time for this, it makes me so happy and strengthens our relationship. It can be something as simple as doing bedtime separately and asking them what was the best part of their day and why.
The Pressure to Be Perfect
We try to make the best choices, keep our cool, and be the parents our kids deserve—all while running on little sleep and neglecting our own well-being. And yet, amid all this, we’re told to cherish every moment, to find joy in the chaos.
Sometimes, it feels like laughter is a rare commodity between maintaining a tidy house, feeding and bathing the kids, and getting homework done. Where’s the fun in all of that?
If you can build fun into your day—something that you all enjoy—it makes the stress more manageable. For us, it’s an evening disco or a crafting session. It’s important to pause, recognize the moment, and cherish what we truly have.
Finding Joy in the Chaos
Parenting doesn’t have to be all about perfection. The joyful moments are often hiding in the chaos. Don’t forget to laugh, to enjoy those little wins, and to celebrate the beauty of now. The mess, the noise, and the love—it’s all part of the journey.
If you’d like some guidance on working out your values and setting meaningful goals, I’m hosting a Vision Board Workshop on Monday, 31st March. This two-hour session is perfect for anyone looking to clarify their values and intentions for the year ahead.
What’s Included?
Part 1: We’ll work through identifying your core values and goals, so you can focus on what really matters to you.
Part 2: After setting your intentions, you’ll get to craft your own vision board using luxurious materials that will bring your vision to life.
Details:
📍 Location: The RookWood, Leytonstone E11
🕖 Time: 7:30–9:30pm
🍷 Includes a Welcome Drink
💸 Price: £25 per person
This workshop will give you the space to reflect, gain clarity, and create something tangible that represents your dreams for the future.
I’d love for you to join us! 🌟